To the New Year 2018

Real Talk:

I’m not exactly good at resolutions.  We all know I’m easily distracted.

And worn out.

Knowing this, I cannot get my brain to look at it all differently.

Last year I worked on a quest log for myself.  Despite the fact they weren’t resolutions, my brain couldn’t help but think of those quests, even the legendary ones, as things that had to be completed in a year.

The last week of 2017 found myself dwelling on this fact and evaluating everything I haven’t done, completed, or just gave up on.  That list is long.

And it’s a lie.

You hear that brain?  You’re a lying sack of…

It’s funny to look at the last year and realize that things changed, even when they really didn’t.  Priorities may have shifted or new paths emerged.  I feel like I’m in a completely different area than I envisioned last year and I think that’s what is throwing me the most.

It’s true.  I didn’t write as much as I wanted last year.  No new music found its way onto the paper.  I didn’t explore writing Poetry as much as I had hoped.  Even after laying the ground work for ongoing collaboration projects for it, the words didn’t make their way out of the pen.

I did not lose the weight I wanted to.

I did not start a podcast.

I did not continue to post all year on this blog.

Reluctant Adventurer is still living inside my head along with her older sister and the siblings I see coming after her.

We did not find the cause or answer to our fertility issues.

We did not take those day trips or hikes we had hoped to.

And once again, a year has passed where we only found ourselves out at the lake fishing one or two times.  And no camping.

But that doesn’t mean those things can’t happen.  It’s not the end because the year ended.  They’re still wonderful quests to have and I’m not willing to turn them out just yet just because the things that happened last year moved ahead of them.

In 2017…

I took a full time job out of the house in my preferred field, albeit in an area I’m not very familiar with, while continuing to pursue my freelance voice work and continued to see growth and success there.  In both places it seems.

I finally had an opportunity to be on the air again in my home town.  On the station and format I’m passionate about no less.  (Maybe my happiest part of December.  Nerdy, I know.)

Jumped in to the streaming world after talking myself out of it countless times.  Became an affiliate by my Birthday in May and became friends with some of the most amazing, supportive people on Twitch, Twitter, and World of Warcraft.  Some of which I may have very much admired and adored from a far for several years.

Became a Mythic Raider in Warcraft.  Wasn’t really expecting that.  Still not sure I want to be one, but I’m still honored and thrilled that several guilds have taken me into this content.

Made some amazing and supportive friends through Mythic raiding.  Wasn’t expecting that either.  LOL

Same goes for Twitter.  Just proves you can meet amazing folks anywhere if given the chance.

I sent Christmas cards!  To the family…and to friends and viewers!  There was even a photo shoot!  Brand new territory here!

I ended the year with less weight than I started it with.  That’s something!

I finally have a specialist looking in to what’s causing all the “lady issues.”  Even had a biopsy scheduled for the new year.

I was a guest on a few podcasts and will be in the New Year as well.  And I recorded an episode of one I’m working on for myself, that has 6-7 episodes lined up and blocked out.

Bought and paid off a car.

After 10 months of mechanical work, bought an engine and had a shop fix our truck.  We did have to get a little loan from my folks to be able to pay for the labor, but the fact we bought the engine outright, then paid the loan back in less than two weeks was a pretty big feat.

Even though I did not complete the goal of getting a DSLR camera by my birthday and learning photography, I did get a Canon Rebel t6i for Yule.  I kept putting it off so we could devote our funds to other things.  Basically, be an adult.  Looking back, we’ve been able to afford one for awhile now, I just wasn’t willing to risk it.  Two amazing points?

While I’m not proud of the explosion that happened between my mother and I, I’m grateful for the relationship we have now.  The relationship my husband and I have with my parents is stronger and closer than it has ever been.

I may not have written a novel or a book of poetry, I did write some.  And the things I did write, while maybe not the best or on the level of the authors I admire, I don’t hate them.

I’m still married to a guy that became and still remains my closest friend, my biggest supporter and pusher of dream chasing.  He even plays Warcraft now!

It truly has been a long year.  There’s been a lot of ups with those downs we’ve been through.  We’ve lost our beloved Raid Dog Winter and we’re still working on how to get through that blow.

And we’re still here.

All in all, I’m not sure where 2018 is going to take us.  I’m not sure I mind not knowing.  The journey really isn’t half bad.

So no goals or resolutions.  Just a look at the quest log make a few notes.  Maybe abandon one or two.  Maybe pick up a few more.  And just keep on powering through the next zone.

-Scruffy Druid Lady

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